In every break down, it's opportunity to do something different. Breakdowns are opportunities for growth.
When I was going through a break up, I knew that this was my moment to put this belief to the test. I had met someone on-line and I knew that I was going to fall in love with this person. We connected on so many levels that I had never before in my life. When he and I met, It was an instant connection. I was like "SHIT." "If we break up or call this off, this is going to be bad for me." I said to myself. But what I also said "No matter what. I am not doing to blame him or shame myself. I am doing to ask the question "What is the moment teaching me about me and what I still need to learn about love."
And that moment arrived, and I was a mess. I started asking myself that question every single say "What is the moment teaching me about me and what I still need to learn about love?" Nothing happened. I would ask myself that question the next day and the next and it wasn't until I got quite enough to listen.
I was in Miami at the time driving back to my mom's house and I was just starring at nothing really. I was driving in silence for a while so I decided to put on my break up playlist.
Yes there was a play list.
As I am listening to the music, I asked myself the question again "What is the moment teaching me about me and what I still need to learn about love?"
This time the answer came. "You are worthy of great love." I started crying. I had to put on my shades because I didn't want people in the passing cars to see me.
Holy shit. I had spent so much time in past relationships trying to prove that was good enough or I am enough or I am worthy of their love. I was always jumping hops, not honoring my needs and putting their needs first, I was compromising who I was just to make them happy and I didn't do that this time around. It was the biggest Ah ha moment about love.
If I did the work on me, every time, love will always give me what I need in that moment. Always. When I see the truth and stand for myself, I am becoming more and more of my authentic self every single time. I access my vulnerability every single time.
Breakdowns might not be comfortable but you'll be grateful later with the lesson that is there for you to learn. When you see the lesson clearly, your eyes are open.
Here is what you want to do, you want to name the breakdown.
Identify What happened versus what you feel about what happened. One is based in reality while the other is your own interpretation of what happened.
Look to relate the break down to your large intention in love.
Reflect upon what is the opportunity is teaching you about yourself and your ability to have and cultivate a happy and healthy relationship.
When you get into this habit, you will grow exponentially and your capacity to love and be loved will expand.